Many years ago I heard a story, perhaps of Chinese origin, about how a mirror is the most valuable weapon or tool a person can ever have, because it makes you look at yourself. David holds the mirror up for you.
Conversing with David is like walking through a mirror maze. Our relationship is not so much about David giving me advice: it’s about me using him to reflect back so I can understand what the consequences will be for the choices I make. When I do that, I make the appropriate adjustments.
Before I engaged David, I thought there might be something a little clinical about mentors. Not so. Not David. If David selects you to be one of his clients, you will, very quickly, develop a deep connection with him. So deep that he will quickly become an “old friend”. The kind of dear friend you can talk to about anything.
David is very caring. He can go along with the flow and then, all of a sudden, he’s really in your face. Not aggressively, but assertively. He once shocked me by saying, “Joy, you sound like a victim.” I thought that was nonsense. He ‘re-wound the tape’ and made me listen to my words. He was right. I was sounding like a victim.
My relationship with David began when my company started to wonder if they were about to lose me. They asked if I was interested in having a mentor. I was not clear about what I wanted to do in life. With life. David’s mentoring has helped me identify ambitions that I didn’t think I had.
David shares a lot of himself. I came out of the retreat thinking that I liked him a lot. I figured we’d get to be really good friends. We have.
David’s got flaws and foibles like the rest of us. But he’s willing to articulate them, and face them head on. That quality makes him a credible mentor. He walks the talk. Like all leaders, David leads by example. The joke, “Take my advice, I’m not using it”, does not apply to my friend David Carter.
